Thursday 10 February 2011

Contador: whoops, someone dropped a clanger.

Photo: Stolen from Velonation article.
Presumaby supposed to be on SaxoBlank site.

"Oh no!"  I hear you say "Not this old story again!"

Yes, this old story, it still rumbles on. And why are we still interested in it?

Well, there was the whole chaingate thing (cries of "boo! hiss!"), and he and Unndy used to be friendies, and if he's banned then Unndy gets the TdF title.....

...so all in all, yes, we are still very interested in this case.

This news report from Velonation two days ago contains a major howler (note for non-UK residents, a howler is a big, big mistake. As in "what a howler!" or " you've made a right howler there".)

They talk about the dreaded clenbuterol tests (by the way Barbara, Susanne and certain others, look at what a short, short neck that eagle has, practically no neck at all, ha ha ha ha ha) and remind us that on the rest day, the 21st July, it was the famous 50 picograms per mililitre.

It progressed thus:

21st July = 50 picograms
22nd July = 16 picograms
24th July = 7 picograms (what happened to the test on the 23rd I wonder?)
25th July = 17 picograms

Now anyone can see that there is a bit of a mistake with those figures: the amount should be going steadily downwards, not having  a sudden upswing at the end.

The obvious conclusion is that Contador had another dose (micro, micro, dose!) late on the 24th, to raise his level for the test on the 25th. No-one seriously thinks that he did so: if 50 picograms is generally agreed to be way too small to improve performance, then 17 picos is really not going to do anything. Unless you believe the theory that Conti was giving himself transfusions of his own blood, taken from days when he was fully oxygenated and bursting with health, blah blah, woof, woof, etc etc.

The report actually says, and I quote:

Jesús Munoz Guerra, director of the Laboratory of Madrid, told Marca that “a rebound in concentration of Clenbuterol from 7 to 17 picograms is more likely an error in estimation of the concentration rather than a second microdose.”

What! Am I the only one screaming "if you are suggesting that there is an error in estimation in 25% of these results, then what possibly credence can we give to any of these results?"  And: "Estimation? These results are only an ESTIMATION????"

I will be amazed if Conti's lawyers don't leap on that little statement.

It now appears that the RFEC (Spanish cycling federation) are going to announce their decision some time this week. Well, it's Thursday already, so brace yourselves, any minute now...

And, as an aside (yes, another one) what on earth are SaxoBlank playing at, having no photo of Conti in new kit on their site, when oh look, there clearly is a photo of him in the new kit?  They could at least wait until he has definitely been banned, and then remove him altogether from the rider roster. Just removing his picture doesn't exactly show quite the support that Bjarne Riis claims to be giving him...

Qatar

Oh, yay, LLB taped the coverage from Eurosport this week - Hooray for Eurosport! - and we watched the first two days last night. We're saving the rest for the weekend.  Best bits have to include:

1) Commentator David Harmon making the following statement "Team Leopard - oh, we're not going to bother will all that lee-o-pard trek stuff." Yay! Just call them Team Schlux, like we do....

2) The way the commentators didn't have a clue about which team was which between Garmin, Team Schlux and Sky...... and said so, repeatedly. So glad it's not just me being unable to tell who is who...

3) Garmin-Cervelo - take a look at the picture below,  Day 1 at Qatar, and tell me what is wrong about it:


OK take a look at their jerseys.... at the arms... at the armbands.... blue, aren't they? Big letter E with an accent, then underneath that, a blue band. Except for one rider. Who appears to have tucked up his blue bands.  Huh?
"I'll wear it on one leg, but not on my arms"?
"My arms are shorter than everyone else's, and I need to roll up my sleeves, but have been told not to obscure the sponsor logo"?
"Anything to look less like Team Schlux"? (In which case he'd need to tuck up the leg as well.)
Or is it like a school playground thing, where the cool kid starts a trend to tuck up his sleeves: will the rest of them be doing it by day 4?

Any suggestions welcomed. Oh, and if anyone knows which rider it is, I'd appreciate that information as well. (in those ridiculous sunglasses, they all look the same to me, except for the back one, who looks like Contador. Hmm, that must be wrong?)  If it turns out to be Barbie Barbie I will shriek with joy!

Oh, and 4), Leelu, remember your lovely voice post, pronouncing the English names for us? I was teasing you about Graham Brown, and there's two things - firstly, no-one has corrected me but it's actually Graeme Brown, the "silly" spelling, as we say, so now I understand why you included it - people might have been confused.

I was very tempted to add a note to your post "telling" you that really, it's pronounced Gray-eee-mee but I thought that might be a bit mean.

And then, watching the first 2 days of Qatar, Graeme Brown (of Rabobank, as everyone knows, don't they?) was in the leading group and I kid you not, the commentators must have said his name about, ooh, fifty times? At least?  And every time they did, LLB and I both chorussed his name in your accent! It was very funny! One day I'll be brave enough to make a voice post too, and then I'll say it, doing my impression of you saying it, and you'll see how funny it sounds. All together now:!



Radios:

OK, Miss Fede has covered this subject absolutely perfectly, and I agree pretty much word for word with Gnasher, when she says: "I didn't watch procycling before radios were introduced, so I have nothing to compare todays races against. As it is, I find it exciting! It seems that if a majority of pro riders are opposed to it, then their concern should carry a lot of weight in the decision making process."

I can so understand the riders getting so very cross at such a rule being brought in by people who don't actually push those pedals themselves, and so have no idea what they are talking about...

LLB and I discussed this at length, and his clever idea was to have radios, but to have just one channel, ie not individual frequencies for each team. There would be a neutral controller, who would issue safety warnings to the riders, and take any distress calls, but there wouldn't be the same tactical planning (unless a ds was prepared to tell all of the peloton what his chaps were about to do). It would be a bit like the [terrible! terrible!] Eurovision Song Contest, where the neutral controller would speak his messages in English, French, German, and a small variety of other languages. Or everyone would have to learn English, ha! ha!

It was quite funny watching Team Schlux powering up to the front of the peloton on Day 2 in Qatar, with no radios of course, you could hear Bennati hollering at the guy in front!

Finally for today (phew! what a lot we've had to catch up on!)
Team Schlux Kit.

Wiggle, purveyors of the fabulous Stripey Lux Schlecklander Socks,  have just started offering a range of team kit.  About the only possible useful item for me would, again, be the socks, but there's no photo of them yet. Any bets?  Plain white, with a narrow band of black at the top, with a narrow band of faded turquoise underneath it?


Mmmm, nice.


Talking of socks, I can't quite believe what I am looking at here: J E James Cycles  seem to be offering a sock that has the word "Wanker" embroidered on it.

It is part of the SockGuy range, the ones who provided our lovely striped Lux socks, and is clearly described as the Wanker Sock.

They promote it as follows:

"For ALL our friends in the UK we introduce the Wanker Sausage Company socks. Where's the beef? Established in 1889."

I assumed this was a non-UK company on whom someone was playing a joke - "Yeah, really, mate, "wanker" means "tasty" in English, tasty sausage company, go on, take a batch, special introductory price" - as the promotional phrase is written as though by a non-English speaker... for all you students of English slang, the expression is "What's your beef?" meaning "what is your problem or objection?"   But it appears to be a genuine UK company. Weird...

Ideal gift for Contador, perhaps? In more than one way?

18 comments:

  1. I knew it! I actually had the thought that Bertie probably had been given the kit with the short-necked eagle and that he wanted the photo removed from the website because of this! Ha, ha!

    Team Schlux socks: http://twitpic.com/3nn4fx
    No turquoise but sad cyclops/smiley-thingy.

    Wanker Socks are a great gift for Bertie! :D

    Btw, I'm still sad because I can't find anyone who wants to sell me the Lux Schlecklander Socks without charging me twice as much as the socks cost for shipping...

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  2. My suspicion is that Mr. No Blue Bands is working on evening out his tanlines.

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  3. Mister Contador isn't looking TipTop in that picture. So many deep lines in his face (wonder about his true hair colour), maybe he's doing too many chores?

    Why is it Grayeemee and not Grayjemuhh? English is worse than Dutch!

    About the picture from Cervelo-Garmin > poepende riders

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  4. I thought that G-C rider was Barbie Barbie. Though in other photos he does have the blue arm strips...

    Yes, well it's VERY serious business this Graeme Brown stuff - that's why his name must be said in such a solemn manner ;P

    LOL at Contador's tiny little eagle!

    Leelu

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  5. Thanks Susanne, for the pic of the socks: yawn, they're not very colourful, are they? And if I had some, I would have to take a fabric pen to them, and add eyes..... and eeeuw, the hostess lady was wearing patent shoes with bare legs, ugh!

    Danielle, aha, good point, but surely that would only shift the tan line upwards? And he must have taken great care to "tuck": on Day 2 there was just a tiny slice of blue visible on his left arm, so he must have done it deliberately... how intriguing.

    Ha ha Barbara, yes, too many chores.

    Graeme and Graham are two ways of spelling the same name, and both are pronounced Gray-Ummm. English is worse than almost anything, except possibly Czechoslovakian (as it was when I tried to learn a little of it).

    And it's no good trying to get away with saying rude words in Dutch, we know what that means! You bad girl. (*wags finger sternly at Barbara*)

    @Leelu, LOL also! Eagle-ette!

    Coug

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  6. G-C rider with sleeves folded up is Johan Van Summeran :)

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  7. So THIS is where you're all hiding! Trying to get rid of me, were you? Huh, HUH?!

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  8. Kara, so happy you are back!!! Now CG can wag her finger not only at me anymore!! (besides I think it's a little bit unfair, because Lee is creating more intense things in my mind than I ever wrote down :))

    I understand the Grayumm stuff, sounds logical, but I got confused with the Grayeemeee thing.

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  9. what-what??!! I'm completely innocent, Barbara and have no idea what you could possibly be talking about ;P hehehe

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  10. Leelu, you are a star - an eagle-eyed star - that rider is indeed Johan Van Summeran, which I pronounce exactly as it is spelled. And in all the days of Qatar, he had his sleeves tucked up like that. Weird.

    Fabian with shorts rolled up, huh? I will look for pictures....

    Kara! (*opens arms for big hug*) Welcome back, where have you been? I'm in Andyhab, and not allowed to post pics and drool until I have 50 followers. Until then, we are doing Serious Cycling Opinions, er hem, well, at least, that's what we are trying for....

    You've missed our acceptance of the word "tiptop" back into everyday language, apparently it means "perfect" in Luxemburgisch and was used by Our Glorious Leader during the Team Schlux presentation. Oh, and we don't bother will all that shouting of LEE-O'PARD etc.

    And as you can see, Leelu is now being blamed for corrupting Barbara, but I have my doubts!!

    Coug
    Feeling Tiptop this morning

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  11. Coug,

    In the few moments I allow myself to fritter away my time, may I say, with affection, curses, curses to you for reintroducing the Luxembourgish I have been trying to un-learn!

    Now when I tell people I like to cook, I'll really be thinking, "Ech kache gären". Damn!

    I confess to watching Luxembourg Paul's Lëtzebuergesch lessons (http://www.youtube.com/user/luxpaul) more than once. Each.

    Okay, must not get distracted by Moselle Franconian language, and get back to work now,

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  12. Figbash, hi - that's you, isn't it! Well done my little Luddite, you figured it out!

    Everyone else, you have GOT to go and watch Paul's vids, it's the same guy that does the Let'z Learn vids.

    I have just watched lesson number one, how to say hello, how to say "how are you" and how to reply - and he says, with a perfectly straight face - if you are feeling really great, you say "Tiptop" ! ! ! ! ! Hoots of hysterical laughter from Schleckland!

    Tiptop!

    Rain forecast tomorrow, so I might have Something To Say on the subject of Conti being let off, grrr, grrrr.

    Coug

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  13. I remember a drink called "TipTop". They used to sell them in the tuck shop at my school for about 10p.

    Is PeeDee here?

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  14. (pauses for tumbleweed to blow across the screen) Not just at this minute, but yes! She's with us! As are Leelu, FeeDee, Susanne, Barbara (appearing as Barbara Noob in the Followers box), and many of the former Schlecklanders.

    Do feel free to join as a follower - I'm trying to get 50 followers!

    Coug

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  15. PS the drink, sounds a bit familiar, was it some sort of fruit squash?

    Also I'm thinking of something like Angel Delight, one of those insubstantial fuzzy frothy things... ring any bells?

    Coug

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  16. Er hem:

    http://www.vintagemagazinecompany.co.uk/tip-top/9813-tip-top-vol-3-no-4-1979.html

    Best not opened at work...

    Coug

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  17. Yes it was a kids fruit squash, came in 2 flavours as I recall, orange and (I think) blackcurrant or similar. See through cheap plastic carton, sort of corrugated, with a lid that you had to pierce with a straw.

    Really showing my age now! I don't remember the Angel Delight one. Or the magazine!

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  18. Laughing so hard at the wee Eagle comments! Also, that Barbie Barbie site is priceless.

    The radio ban is a contentious topic at the Gnasher household. I told husband I was quoted by the venerable Coug. He was proud of me, but remains unwavering in his opinion. Ch! He didn't watch cycling before radios, but he is convinced it will be "that" much more exciting without radios. Well, it's nice to see that many fans do agree with keeping radios.

    Coug, you are doing well with the # of followers!

    Kara, nice to see you around these parts again!

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