The Leopards May Yet Be Back!

Yes, Schlecklanders, it's all getting very exciting on the Sponsor front.

As we all know, Nissan withdrew sponsorship from RadioShambles due to Lance Bloody Armstrong and the doping admissions.

And RadioShambles themselves are no longer a massively profitable company, there have been many reports over the last year or more that they are taking losses, trying to work out how to update their image etc, and I have to say, about time -  I mean, "shack"? For that matter, "radio"? Not exactly a high tech image, is it?

As far as cycling is concerned, the name RadioShack is always going to be associated with L-bloody-A, along with the names US Postal and Discover.

I have previously suggested that the Leopards should dump the RadioShack name, to free themselves from this association, and now it looks as though I may have my wish, as RadioShambles have announced that they are removing sponsorship at the end of this season,  ( ha ha, so much for Mr Becca's announcement last month that the idea was "pure speculation" and that no-one from the sponsor had contacted him to discuss it *sniggers mightily* ) and that Trek will become the main sponsor.

The recent report also highlights the point that the only thing holding up is the deal is that Mr Becca, holder of the UCI licence, is trying to sell it to Trek but is demanding a high price: the report diplomatically describes it as "The two sides are struggling to agree on a price".

I assume that it would be a great deal easier to continue cycling with an existing licence than to apply for a new one, especially half-way through a season.. and the phrase "over a barrel" is coming to mind, along with such things as "blackmail" and "greedy" and "did you know nothing about cycling before you decided to buy a team?"

 Leaving aside my personal animosity for Mr Becca, who was supposed to be this great family friend who would open all doors and make all things possible, but has turned out to be ignorant of cycling (at a TTT - "those riders who couldn't keep up, send them home, they're rubbish!") and apparently ignorant of the concept that sponsorship does not mean "money-making enterprise" it means putting your money in to get exposure/publicity/better PR etc, and does not actually help someone who does not own a "brand", as it were. *sigh* Where was I? Oh yes, I think they'd do better without him. Thankfully they've already been able to dump Mr Bruyneel, so he's well out of the picture - anyone know what's happening to him? Anyone care? No, thought not.

So, what could this mean?

Well, we get rid of the horrible RadioShambles name, for a start.

I expect the kit would stay broadly similar.

The name? It would be nice to return to Lay-O'Pard Trek, but I suspect it would be Trek Leopard, - oh dear, we'll all be singing the terrible Trekking song... what's that? You don't know it? Shame on you! Settle down, then, I'll tell you all about it.

It started as a folk song called "I am the music man" which kiddies of my generation had to learn at primary school. The teacher would sing - "I am the music man and I come from down your way, and I can plaaaay" we would chorus "What can you plaaay" to which they would respond "I can play the (musical instrument, repeated three time)" and they would then do an impression of the named instrument.  They'd go through this routine again, with a different musical instrument, then repeating the first one (with us kiddies joining in) and the song would expand and expand.

Reasons for doing this, other than keeping kiddies  out of mischief on a rainy day? It taught us to listen and copy, it taught us the names of musical instruments that we would not encounter in our normal life (a tuba? who knew what a tuba was, at primary school?) and what they sounded like (well, a bit) . We learned to wait our turn, we learned to join in together - all sorts of good things.

Turn the clock forward several decades, Star Trek arrived, and the music man song resurfaced as the Star Trek Man, with the verses no longer musical instruments, but members of the crew. "I can play Lieutenant Uhura, Lieutenant Uhura, Lieutenant Uhura.... Hailing frequencies open, Captain, open, Captain, open, Captain," etc.

Turn forward another few decades, and someone made a pop song out of it, changing the opening chorus from "I am the Star Trek Man" to "Star trekking, across the universe, on the star ship Enterprise, under Captain Kirk *sniggering from all around* Star trekking, across the universe, only going forward, 'cos we can't find re-verse."

At this point, I tried to insert the video, but it doesn't seem to be working - here's a link to the video, but if that doesn't work, please go to yootoob and type in "Star Trekkin'  The Firm" and you will find it.

Makes me laugh every time - particularly the way it gets faster and faster!

I can't help thinking that we could adapt the lyric a bit:

Chorus:

We're Trekking, we're in the Tour de France
Sometimes we're behind, and sometimes in advance,
We're Trekking, we're in the Tour de France,
Leading out the peloton, they don't stand a chance.

Verses: here are some that come to mind off the top of my head, based on what our commentators tend to say:

He's gonna do a proper job, proper job, proper job; he's gonna do a proper job, do a proper job.

He's on the rivet, pedallin' squares, pedallin' squares, pedallin' squares; he's on the rivet, pedallin' squares, really pedallin' squares,

He's got the magic spanner out, spanner out, spanner out; he's got the magic spanner out, got the magic spanner.

Oh, look, a sticky bottle, sticky bottle, sticky bottle; oh look, a sticky bottle, whoops! Commisaire!

He's going large, he's super strong, super strong, super strong; he's going large he's super strong, he's really super strong.

Sky are on the the front again, front again, front again; and Sky are on the front again, they're on the front again.

Or, verses for individuals, perhaps:

Cavendish "Me team were -'king brilliant, brilliant, brilliant; me team were -'king brilliant, -'king brill-i-ant!"

Jensie: "Shut up legs,  Shut up legs, Shut up legs, Shut up legs: Shut up legs, Shut up legs, Shut up, SHUT UP LEGS!"

Sir Dave Brailsford: "We're looking for the marginal gains, marginal gains, marginal gains; we're looking for the marginal gains,  and we won Tour De France!!"

I'm sure that some of you can come up with better ones...